The Sassy Sandpiper proposes a multi-purpose holiday.

By M.R. Wilson, TB Reporter

In the good old days, I’d be appalled to see Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving.

Nowadays, area stores are bedecked for three holidays at once:  Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Honestly, it seems like glitter and ghouls, gobblers and garlands begin appearing shortly after the Fourth of July. I’ve seen mini outdoor lights shaped like candy corn, cat skeletons so realistic it was disturbing to look at them longer than five seconds; candles and kitchen linens with turkeys and fall foliage; and eight tiny reindeer and faux pines decorated as nice as you please. All under one retail roof.

Taking all this in stride, I propose a new season with a new name: HALLOTHANKMAS. You can decorate, dress, cook, and gift give for three holidays, all at once, and simply remove items as the individual celebrations pass. Just imagine! New decorations, greeting cards (can’t wait to see what Hallmark does with this), gift baskets, traditional food and drink, new must-have toys, technology, jewelry, new songs—stand by, YouTube!

Here are some ideas to help get you started creating your own new Hallowthankmas traditions.

Food: Hallothankmas Pizza. Top with your favorites from each of the three holidays. Maybe you want to make the bottom layer green bean casserole. Top with gruyere, mushrooms, and caramelized onions. Or not. It’s your pizza. Follow with Guacamoldy Eye Balls  – Mexican deviled eggs for Halloween.

Drink:  Start with a Cosmopolitan. Top with whipped cream, dark chocolate shavings, and cinnamon.

Dessert:  Scotch shortbread topped with small peanut butter cups and crushed candy canes.

Decorations:  These are the most fun, offering endless creative possibilities. A turkey wishbone, ever popular holly sprigs, candy corn.

Maybe I’ll decorate my dead avocado tree, drowned in the recent torrential rains. I like cinnamon-scented brooms and am partial to marigolds, sunflowers, doves, punk tree bark, and Norfolk Island Pine “needles.”

I also like ancient, crumbling Celtic cross grave markers, Nativity scenes, bats, wooden and cloth ornaments, hexenbiest , pumpkins, black cats, poinsettias, wolves, feathers, bead garland, puppies, mistletoe, crows, old bottles, black bears, Liebfraumilch, kittens, sweet potatoes, vintage jewelry, spiders, bells, horses, Jesus, Scotch shortbread, stars—to name a few. Throw them all together in a collage, wreath, altar, or centerpiece. Or on a Fraser fir.

Colors: Black, cranberry, gold

Gems:  Onyx, garnet, topaz

The designated time frame for Hallothankmas is from Halloween to Epiphany.

The neatest part of this new holiday season is that you can create it using all your own favorite things. Blend the best of your observances into something fresh, bright with blessings. There is no wrong way to do this.

Think Sassy’s lost it? Maybe so. But Hallothankmas preparations beat the tar out of other current national preoccupations, which shall remain nameless. I hope you’ll join in the spirit of this newly minted season, foregoing the “holiday rush.”

The Hallothankmas ugly sweater party promises to be a doozy.

The Sassy Sandpiper | M.R. Wilson | Hallothankmas | Holidays | TB Reporter

#TheSassySandpiper #MRWilson #Hallothankmas #Holidays #TBReporter