Welcome to the monthly installment of  “Ask Sassy: Advice You Can Take or Leave.” It’s an advice column written by the Sassy Sandpiper. Want to hear what Sassy thinks? Send her an email to m.r.wilson@tbreporter.com. (And, no, in this one case, we don’t have to use your real name. That is, unless you say it’s okay.) BTW, the advice given does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of TB Reporter.

By M.R. Wilson, TB Reporter

On the job spy

Dear Sassy,

I’m the front desk guy at a major fitness center. My manager asked me to watch a co-worker. She is a group fitness trainer. He asked me to check how many people are in her classes and if she is on time. I was to watch her, but not tell her (of course), and report back to him.

I felt like this was totally wrong. Like he was was asking me to spy on her. I really didn’t want to do it. But I observed her classes for about a week. She was on time for each class. I did tell my manager but I upped the number of people in her classes a little.

This was a couple of weeks ago and I still feel lousy for doing it. I hope I’m never asked to watch another co-worker. If I am, I might refuse but I don’t want to get in trouble or lose my job. What’s your advice?

Joe, Lakeland

Dear Joe,

I applaud you for listening to your conscience. You obviously care about people. If you are asked to report on a co-worker in the future, do it but also follow your own moral compass. If you feel comfortable, ask your manager to tell you why he’s concerned. You could say, “Has there been a particular problem? I’d just like to have a little insight, if you don’t mind.”

Dear Sassy:

How can I get my neighbor to stop bringing over store-bought cookies, pies, and other stuff every time I do her a little favor? I printed some documents for her earlier in the week. Actually, they were for a friend of hers. Anyway, here she came this morning with a huge box of coconut raisin cookies and another big box of croissants. I just don’t want this stuff in the house. Is there any way I can tell her I don’t want anything without hurting her feelings? She has a heart of gold.

Thanks.

Danielle, Gulfport

Dear Danielle,

No. There is no way to reject a gift without hurting the giver’s feelings. Thank her profusely and donate the goodies to a food pantry, take them to work, or share with friends and family. Next time she does you a favor, reciprocate with edibles you like, or with flowers, or a plant. You don’t want to break that heart of gold. They’re hard to come by these days.

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